I frequently hear from Foxxes-of-a-certain-age how difficult it is to make friends after 50. Most women by now are deeply ensconced in their groups, communities, and cliques. Sometimes there isn’t room (or willingness?) to add an outsider.
It takes time to find and nurture friendships, is it worth it? I say, yes. Amy Poehler said,
“Female friendships are the untapped fossil fuel”
and I wholeheartedly agree. If we want stronger friendships, we need to assess who is on our team, and consider where we need to be stronger friends.
A friendship inventory is an assessment of your squad and it goes something like this. Grab a pen and paper, identify the 5 people you spend the most time with, and determine:
-
Liabilities
- Who drains you?
- Who lies?
- Who is overly competitive?
- Who encourages unhealthy behaviors?
- Who gossips?
-
Assets
- Who inspires?
- Who listens?
- Who cheers?
- Who tells the truth?
- Who do you laugh with?
-
Self-inquiry
- Where do you need to cull the herd?
- How do you measure up?
- Do you need to step up your commitment?
To make a friend takes effort. To be a friend takes work.
Let’s get to work, Babes.
